Monday, April 28, 2008

This is why it's called "the web"

So...follow along with the weird path my browsing took this morning.

Via Digg, I came across this article about a murder that is believed by some detectives to be part of a series of killings, most likely by a group, in the northern midwest. I tend to agree, actually, even though it sounds very conspiracy-theorist. Given the target type (popular jocks), my guess is it's a web of nerdy, computer-using square pegs, a la the Columbine shooters, preying on drunk jocks after parties.

I also didn't take long to find out there was a made-for-TV movie in 1999 called Happy Face Murders, about a serial killer who signs his messages with happy faces. Weird.

So I went looking for more about the actual murders/deaths, and that's when I came across Godlike Productions, a forum full of conspiracy theorists. My love for conspiracy theories is well known, so this looks like a pleasant playground I'll be returning to frequently. From calls for Warriors of Light to ENGULF the world in light on to "Bible Code" predictions of an Ebola Virus biological attack next week - this forum has everything. Even claims that The Last Mimzy, a kid's movie about a magical box that can do seemingly anything, was based on a true story. Awesome.

From there, I followed a link on one post to a site with a little video about "the history of the Cathars." I knew little of the Cathars, so I looked them up in Wikipedia, which had the dope on them. They were a 12th century Christian sect with some pretty weird thinking, who were basically wiped out by a crusade sent against them by Pope Innocent III, and then cleaned up by the Inquisition (no one expects the Spanish Inquisition!)

The video, however, claims that during the siege that basically wiped out the sect, four priests (even though the Cathars didn't have priests as such) divided up a scroll into four parts and took it with them and hid it. The scroll, the video says, was written by Christ himself and says that everybody got him all wrong and the Cathars were right.

Because, you know, all that time he was kicking around with the apostles preaching, he never bothered to the tell the apostles, "No, man, you got me all wrong...it's like this..." and instead he wrote it down and hid it somewhere for a sect that just happened to dig on what he was really saying over a thousand years later. That makes sense.

And these four Cathars went on to found a secret society called "weavers" who weave coded messages into clothes and tapestry in the form of imperfections, and all the codes contain the year 2012, and that's when the Cathars/Weavers are going to get the scroll back together and show everybody.

Hooooo boy. Praise Jesus and pass the LSD.

3 comments:

Claire said...

I think my brain just stopped with all the loppyloopyness!

Cxx

Mattbear said...

That's how my brain felt. That's why I had to share it. If I kept it confined in my brain, my head would explode.

Anonymous said...

The only conspiracy here is the one woven by a viral marketing campaign on behalf of Universal Pictures and a forthcoming movie release in June.

By the use of ARG's (Alternate Reality Game, a game where the enjoyment comes from the evocation of a consistent, plausible fictional reality. Usually played in teams over the internet, often featuring websites with hidden messages) which are strategically placed in blogs, forums, stand alone websites. It allows the studio greater control in pre-release.

A simple online search to reputable scholarly sources will quickly disprove the premise of any of the links cited.

I mean really...alms giving vegetarian pacifists morph into pistol packing assassins and not one single authenticated source to back it up.

Brad Hoffstetter
Communications Division
Assembly of good Christians
www.cathar.net